Life Advice from John Waters

John Waters (father of fantastic films like Pink Flamingo) has published a wonderful book called Role Models. Among many wonderful things between the covers are ten pieces of life advice. Life advice from John Waters, yes, on the surface it might seem unorthodox, but hey, this is a guy who's made a career out of being well..a freak. I place these at your feet for review. I particularly stand by #3.

1. “If someone is racist and really cute, could you still have sex with him? I have to admit the answer is yes. I have. You just change the subject or shout, ‘La la la la la la la,’ covering your ears when he speaks nonsense. If all else fails, stick something in his mouth to shut him up.”

2. “You should never just read for ‘enjoyment.’ Read to make yourself smarter! Less judgmental. More apt to understand your friends’ insane behavior; or better yet, your own. Pick ‘hard books.’ Ones you have to concentrate on while reading. And for God’s sake, don’t let me ever hear you say, ‘I can’t read fiction. I only have time for the truth.’ Fiction is the truth, fool! Ever hear of ‘literature’? That means fiction, too, stupid.”

3. “If you’re not sure you could love your children, please don’t have them, because they might grow up and kill us.”

4. “[F]or all the neurotics who may have felt a little blue one day and were unfairly diagnosed and overly medicated before they could even try to talk out their problems, I have some advice. It’s appropriate to be depressed sometimes. Who wants to be ‘even’ day after day? If you just killed three people in a DWI accident, you should feel bad. If your whole family molested you in a giant basket on Easter morning, you have a right to be grumpy every once in a while. But feeling down can make you feel up if you’re the creative type. The emotional damage may have already been done to you, but stop whining. Use your insanity to get ahead.”

5. “Everybody knows you need young blood in your house. The way to build a great [art] collection is not to have a lot of money and buy established artists; it’s to go to all the galleries once a month and find a brand-new artist you like in a gallery whose stable seems to be up your alley. Go back to the artist’s second show and buy something for around $5,000. It really means a lot to the artist at this stage of the game, and even though you should never buy art just so you can later sell it for a profit, it does perk up looking through the auction results when you see your gamble go sky-high once in a while.”

6. “Parents should understand that their young kids are not like them and need to have the privacy to fantasize both their good and bad desires. What you may find shocking about the perverse behavior of your child may not even be remembered by your offspring later in life. But what you may pooh-pooh as their silly young fears can be more debilitating to your children than you will ever imagine.”

7. “Everybody has his or her ‘love map,’ as the late, great, sadly discredited Baltimore sexologist John Money once called our predetermined sexual types. And we can never really change our love maps, but we can learn to see them coming. A healthy neurotic knows his type can and probably will bring emotional trouble combined with a powerful sexual wallop. But we can see, through effective therapy, that we have a choice. Yes, our love maps may be bad for us, but WOW! I won’t find this kind of sex in a healthy relationship. So is it worth it? If it is, yes, you are fucked-up, but as long as you choose it, you are also neurotically happy.”

8. “Nobody has to meet Tennessee Williams; all you have to do is reread his work. Listening to what he has to say could save your life, too.”

9. “I’m a fascist about my work habits and I expect you to be, too. Never have a spontaneous moment in your life again. If you’re going to have a hangover, it should be scheduled on your calendar months in advance. Rigid enjoyment of planning can get you high. Militant time-management will enable you to ignore how maladjusted you would be if you had the time to notice it in the first place. Discipline is not anal compulsion; it’s a lifestyle that breeds power.”

10. “You don’t need fashion designers when you are young. Have faith in your own bad taste. Buy the cheapest thing in your local thrift shop — the clothes that are freshly out of style with even the hippest people a few years older than you. Get on the fashion nerves of your peers, not your parents — that is the key to fashion leadership. Ill-fitting is always stylish. But be more creative — wear your clothes inside out, backward, upside down. Throw bleach in a load of colored laundry. Follow the exact opposite of the dry cleaning instructions inside the clothes that cost the most in your thrift shop. Don’t wear jewelry — stick Band-Aids on your wrists or make a necklace out of them. Wear Scotch tape on the side of your face like a bad face-life attempt. Mismatch your shoes. Best yet, do as Mink Stole used to do: go to the thrift store the day after Halloween, when the children’s trick-or-treat costumes are on sale, buy one, and wear it as your uniform of defiance.”

The Lovely Laura Marling

I don't imagine that this little blog of mine is a cornerstone of cultural information- that it's highbrow and full of things that most normal Philistine's would never dane to contemplate. It's just my chatter about things I find interesting. I don't even know if anyone reads this blog.

So, from time to time I reserve the right to be silly and fluffy and twee. Today I'm going to talk about a show I saw last night. Laura Marling. Good GOD almighty what a talented woman. I admit it- I have a soft spot in my heart for folk music and using real instruments. I'm a sucker for an acoustic guitar backed up by a cello. Throw a banjo in there every once in a while and you've got me at hello. Last year I stumbled upon Laura Marling while reading a music blog. She had done some work with a few other British bands that I like and I immediately enjoyed her work.

I am officially a big fan. Big. Like how I feel about Andrew Bird. Walking into the club last night I realized she was standing about 2 feet away from me and I got jibbery and kerfoffled like a teenager. It's just that she has such a beautiful voice and her music is open and honest and REAL. I gobbled up the first album and have spent an embarassingly long time on You Tube tracking down odd little tracks (see below).

She's come out with her second album now, entitled "I Speak Because I Can" and it's leaps, bounds, mountains ahead of her first album which was damn impressive in itself. If you're a fan of poetic lyrics and striking vocals Laura Marling is the girl for you.

I was absolutely thrilled and stunned to see the announcement that she would be coming to East Atlanta's venue The Earl, and snapped up tickets immediately. One generally thinks that when they stumble on a little band that they can't possibly be the only one who knows about it, but from the size of the crowd last night I guess maybe that many people don't know about the 20 year old Hampshire, England girl. I am not generally one of those people who yells out from the crowd at a show, but last night asked for "The Wrote & the Writ" and she seemed surprised that anyone remembered it. Remebered it- hell, I tracked it down on ye olde Internet and had it in the CD player for several weeks. Her lack of acknowledgement in the U.S. clearly has more to do with a lack of PR rather than a lack of talent.

Don't say you haven't been told now. Don't walk, run and buy her music.

Here are some samples of her work:
From "I Speak Because I Can"
What He Wrote
I Speak Because I Can
Blackberry Stone

From "Alas I Cannot Swim"
My Manic and I
New Romantic
Alas I Cannot Swim

And, not on her albums but also favorites:
The Wrote & the Writ
Travel Light
Needle and the Damage Done

It was a no photography show, but I'm sorry- I snuck a photo. (see above)
Sorry Laura.

Oh. She doesn't do encores. But you won't care. You'll just be glad you were able to experience the music. Trust me.

Inside the Mind and Letters of Magritte

Clearly I need to win the lottery sooner than later. In a little less than a month Sotheby's in New York will be auctioning a series of over 40 letters and poscards from the Surrealist master Rene Magritte to Paul Colinet.

The correspondence forms an extraordinary record of the artist’s creative process in addition to revealing the literary and artistic influences on his work during the most productive period of his career. Complete with drawings and sketches, many of which are variations on the artist’s well-known canvases. The letters and postcards last appeared on the auction market at Sotheby’s London in 1987, where it was offered in a sale of artifacts from the artist’s studio consigned by his widow. No other significant group of Magritte letters has appeared on the market since.

In 1933, Magritte met the Belgian Surrealist poet Paul Colinet, and the two became close friends rapidly. At the time, Magritte’s personal connections with Surrealism were strained – he had left Paris in disgust and returned home to Brussels – although ironically his artwork remained clearly Surrealist in style. The collection of letters cover a wide range of topics – artistic, literary and surreal – and reveals a remarkable influence Colinet wielded on Magritte and his oeuvre.

In numerous letters Magritte discusses the question of appropriate titles for his paintings. Having acknowledged that Colinet has a rare talent for finding the most suitable title for his paintings, Magritte frequently asks his advice, with a sketch of the picture included. On the verso of an undated letter Magritte pens a landscape, a derivative no doubt of the artist’s iconic L’Empire des Lumières, and writes beneath it, “un titre plaese! (prononcer un ‘titre plisse’).” In another letter Magritte gives his definition of the art of painting, and in yet another, sets out to tackle the question “What does this picture represent?”

A peek inside the mind of the Surrealist genius is presented by a letter in which Magritte digressed on the significance of the number 9 and his prose becomes a bit surreal: “vous avez déjà remarqué que le chiffre 18 compose de 1 et de 8, soit 1 + 8 =9 . . . le chiffre 9, multiplié par lui-même donc 81, soit 8 = 1 = 9 . . .”

The correspondence with Colinet also reveals Magritte’s opinion of various works of literature, at one point expressing disgust with André Breton’s L’art magique and stating he cannot share Colinet’s enthusiasm for the work of Jorge Luis Borges. He goes on to note that he has just received books by Paul Morand, Joseph-Arthur, comte de Gobineau and Martin Heidegger.

*more information can be found at Art Daily

'A Day in the Life' for Sale

When they say that not everything can be bought, it appears that the list of items included in "everything" is growing smaller. I'm not judging, if I was in a bad financial pinch there are not many physical possessions that I call my own that I wouldn't not willingly divest. But I'm not sure I could part with this little jewel.

The final song on "Sgt. Pepper's Lonely Hearts Club Band" titled "A Day in the Life" is up on the auction block. The single piece of paper penned by John Lennon will go under the gavel on June 18th at Sotheby's and are expected to bring between a half a million and $700k pounds.

Inspired by real-life events, including a newspaper artlce about numerous potholes in Blackburn, Lancashire, the song is one of the Fab Four's most recognizable tunes. Strangely enough, the original lyrics do not contain the mildly controversal "I'd love to turn you on," line which jangled many a teenage parents nerves in the early 1960s.

I hope whomever buys it will display it for we plebians to view. John would like that, yep, John would want it.

Beauvoir- On Beauty and Frumpiness

God knows I love the New York times.
Lord knows Simone de Beauvoir's “The Second Sex” is one of the most important feminist tomes in the history of feminist tomes.

So, when Knopf released a new translation of Second Sex this week you might think that the Times would have rushed to press with tasty tidbits previously mistranslated or left wadded on the editing room floor by the original publisher. You'd be wrong. The Times decided to write about of all things, Ms. Beauvoir's looks. Oh sweet irony.


Frankly, it was an interesting article (you can read it here in full) and a nice glimpse into the life and fashion thoughts of an icon. I've always thought Beauvoir was a natural beauty that had the kind of wit and vivacity that would still make her a force to be recconed with if she were still with us today.

At least the Times acknowledged it was being reductionist and superficial. (grin)


I don't know about you, but I'm going to pick up the new version and reaqaint myself with The Second Sex. It's been more than a few years since I've studied the tome and now seems like a good a time as any.

Happy Reading All!!!

Think You Know Picasso?

I thought I knew my fair share about the great master. I know the names of his many wives and lovers, have a fair idea of the amount of work he generated in his lifetime (around 50K pieces) and even the name of his dog (Lump). But, I didn't know his whole name.

Get ready for this one and be glad you don't have to monogram it on any shirt cuffs.

Pablo Diego José Francisco de Paula Juan Nepomuceno María de los Remedios Cipriano de la Santísima Trinidad Ruiz y Picasso.

Whew.

With a big name like that its no wonder he had such a gigantic ego.

Hotel Normandie- Where it's 420 Every Day

During a recent hotel stay my partner expressed his complete frustration that it is so difficult for anyone who smokes to find a hotel where they can smoke in the room. To smoke a cigarette requires getting dressed, scrabbling under the bed for shoes, schleping to the elevator and finding a dingy corner to light up.

I'm pretty sure the Normandie Midtown Hostel in Los Angeles wouldn't blink if I lit up a Marlboro. This new boutique hotel is the first marajuana friendly establishment in the United States. Dennis Peron, a long-time marijuana dispensary owner and medicinal marijuana advocate, is currently remodeling Los Angeles' Hotel Normandie with plans to turn its 106 rooms into a haven for smokers around the world.

When did the hotel open? On 4/20 of course! Peron's ultimate vision for the hotel is of a "hippie rustic" theme with a rooftop deck where users could light up, framed by the hotel's vintage neon sign.

"We have a motto now," Eastman said. "Forget Amsterdam. Meet me at 6th and Normandie. You won't need a passport to come to the Normandie Hotel. You won't need a plane ticket to come to the Normandie Hotel. All roads lead to the Normandie. On the Metro, the bus, the taxis, we're centrally located in the middle of the center of the universe right here."

Eastman grandly bills the hotel as the United Nations of marijuana, and has been polishing some one-liners, which Peron gamely puts in his own words.

Eastman: "You won't need a towel at the bottom of the door. "

Peron: "Yeah, you don't have to put towels down there."

Eastman: "And there are some no-smoking hotels. We're definitely not one of them."

Peron: "We're definitely not. There are some no-smoking hotels. We're not no-smoking."

The Normandie began as a dignified residence hotel in the 1920s. It touted a $1 turkey dinner prepared by Mrs. H.F. Bruner and was a luncheon spot for women's clubs. In 1938 and 1939, it was briefly home to British author Malcolm Lowry, who was reworking his masterpiece, "Under the Volcano." In 1957, rooms cost $4, and in 1970, they were only $7. In the 1980s, the hotel was a retirement center.

Most recently, with rooms advertised on banners at $49.99, it catered to budget travelers, long-term tenants and Korean-speaking visitors. Its nightclub and restaurant, with their fanciful and outdated decor, are abandoned. Its lobby houses an odd assemblage of furniture and vending machines. Its rooms are decorated in a palette of flesh tones. It is comfortable but worn.

Very little marijuana is evident. But Eastman says the hotel has had some pot-smoking visitors. And Peron and some friends have established an outpost on the fourth floor.

On a recent day, Caroline Lewis had a blunt wedged into a notch in an ashtray beside her bed. She said she smokes pot for back pain from the epidurals she had during four C-sections. She moved in about three months ago and loves the vibe. "Oh, God, it is so freaking terrific," she said. "It'll give medical patients a safe environment where they aren't hassled by the police."

She lives with Dennis Carpenter, who says he has been smoking marijuana to relieve stress. He works for Evangelista and was helping refurbish the rooms. "I was envisioning it to be like a green hotel," he said. "I was expecting it to be a lifelong project."

Dude....

Oh George- Return Your Library Books

I've been more than a little guilty of keeping library books out entirely too long. I lost one once- in the back of a taxi, and it was returned to the library nearly a year later. I had already paid for the book in full, but liked to think of it being passed hand to hand, taxi ride to taxi ride across Atlanta.

I digress...

There was an interesting little snippet in the news today about our first President and his overdue library books. Apparently, in going through his papers a historian found two books and a chit for their return date from the New York Society Library. If Mr. Washington was around today to sheepishly return them to the library he would owe about $4,500. Not too bad considering they're over 220 years overdue. I can't imagine what kind of penalties the IRS would slap on you if you were that late paying back taxes.

The New York library, a subscription library that was New York's first library open to the public, has known about the missing books since the 1930s. The matter came up again recently because the library is capturing the ledgers in digital form to preserve the records.

Library officials cross-checked the books mentioned in the ledger with the ones in their collection. "Volume 12 (of "Common Debates") was still missing," as was the other book, Goldstein said. The library is not so concerned about the fine as it is about each book.